Published on the York University Blog on May 26, 2009
There is this wonderful place that exists beyond the essay. After spending the last few weekends holed up in my one room apartment cut off from the outside world I have returned to reality once again. I have been hunched over various Global Politics books skimming articles at lightening speed. I have been leaning into my laptop screen with squinted eyes while frantically chewing on pieces of gum to stay calm. I have taken stress naps when I have stressed about being stressed. But all of this academic agony is now over.
During my hermitage I could have been mistaken for a hobo, a smart hobo, but still a hobo. I wore the same York University hoodie and pair of shorts for a few days running and kept the schedule of a vampire. My internal clock had changed as I stayed up until 5 am and woke up in the early afternoons. Even when I was up I didn’t draw back my curtain for fear that I would be tempted by the sunlight. I would want to walk about on the Danforth and sit on a patio. I had no time for summer daydreams I only had to think about Politics. I began to hate the people who were leisurely tending to their gardens in the backyard, chatting with their neighbours and lazing in the sun. I would make brief calls to the outside world which were usually cut short as I quickly uttered, “I gotta study, I gotta study.”
I had begun to live the life of a monk or one could argue Howard Hughes during his crazy days. The pizza man came to the door and I was never so happy to see anyone. He stepped inside the door and let the fragrances and the breezy warmth in from the spring day. I finally realized exactly what I was missing in my den of academic discipline.
“It’s so lovely outside.” I wailed. He must have thought that I was a little unbalanced so I explained quickly that I had been studying all day
“You need to get out though. Take a break.”
If the pizza man said so, then it must be okay. I began to loosen up a bit and gave myself walks to the park which rejuvenated my academic juices. I made calls to my friends that lasted more than 10 minutes. I basically tried to calm down. And now that it’s over, as if I’d recovered from a long illness, everything looks pretty good. Well except for my apartment which still has articles strewn across the floor and dishes piled high in the sink. But that can wait.